Assertiveness conquer your inner strength

If you want to learn how to Stand up for yourself, or to get your view point out which allows other people to respect your opinion you must learn the Secrets of Assertiveness.

I was once a coward, someone who was picked on by other people, walked on and because of this I had anger. I remember the first time I was assertive, I stumbled over my words, I sweated and I could barely get my words out, terrified that the other person would beat me up. But overtime as I continued to use these principles people began to respect me as I voiced my opinion, and something changed in me and my confidence rose. This is the power of being Assertive. 

I love people, but when people do something that is hurtful or repetitive and you need to speak up, the Power of Assertiveness comes into play. It forces people to respect you, because how you speak screams Respect. It’s about respecting the other person by verbalizing your own thoughts, and NOT tearing them down and attacking them.  

Assertiveness is not to bring people down or blame people for what you're angry or feeling. It’s about using "I" messages and not "you" messages.

People who are sensitive like me, and individuals in general try to avoid conflict. It will not be easy to confront people the first time you use assertiveness, but you will see a change in how people will speak to you, and you will begin gaining confidence to speak your mind in any situation. Here are some ways to begin being Assertive:

1) Use “I” messages: If you want to get your point across make sure to use "I" messages. "This is how I felt about (blank), and not "you" messages, "you made me feel like this". It will allow people to listen to you, examine what they did.

2) Look them in the eye: If you're looking around nervously and not making direct eye contact with them they will not listen to you, and laugh it off as if it was nothing. Respect the other person by making eye contact.

3) Keep it Short: Say what you mean, and mean what you say. If someone did something to you, that you did not appreciate, make sure to keep your words short, and allow that person to respond, it could be as simple as "Hey I didn't like what happened back there, I would appreciate it, if you wouldn't speak to me like that anymore" and end it there. Wait for them to respond

4) Be patient: Don't allow yourself to be consumed with anger when someone offends you. Take some time to breathe to relax, to understand the situation and then patiently wait for a time where they're alone to speak with them. 

5) Speak with Gentleness: Assertiveness is powerful because it comes from a tone of confidence and respect for the other person. Make sure not to attack, but be gentle and straightforward in how you feel. You will find the other person much more responsive in their actions.

* All of these also apply to crowd setting or group setting when you're speaking. Continue using "I" messages and not "You" messages, and don't be afraid to speak your mind, you will find over time that you will have more respect for people as they will gain more respect for you. Blessings!

My Story==>> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CrepJUBr2SM

The Power of Assertiveness ===>> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G0iTGUKy368

Follow me on Twitter ====>> https://twitter.com/svetnazarov

The Top Secrets to build Confidence

During my Social anxiety years I lacked confidence. What this led down too was times where I needed to speak my mind but I didn't. This turned to people picking me apart, bullying and using me because I had no Idea how to stand up for myself. When I became a christian and started changing and using the principles I now teach, I began growing in confidence because of my faith. I was slowly able to stand up for myself, and have the courage to go out in public and speak to people face to face, never cowering again. Using these principles and the breathing technique I showed earlier will allow you to become more confident, and to do things you have always wanted to do, like public speaking, being assertive, and speaking your mind.

It Boils down to this, Confidence. Everyone wants it but few people have it. So how do you stick out from the crowd and gain some confidence under your belt? Confidence boils down to two things, knowing who you're and not caring what others might think of you. This allows you to be free with your speech, conduct and personal thoughts. You walk around with your head held high, knowing who you're and were you're going. Confidence is not arrogance or thinking you're better than anyone else. It is knowing your place, and having the ability to say and do what is right, without fear of what others might think of you. Here are some simple steps to begin building confidence today.

1) Look people in the eye: Eye contact screams respect. Practice looking people in the eye and talking with them. If you feel uncomfortable with this at first, try looking at the persons forehead.

2) Put yourself into uncomfortable situations that grow you: In order to learn who you're and grow in confidence put yourself in situations that feel uncomfortable. If you hate public speaking, sign yourself for a public speaking class. Confidence is knowing who you're and were your going. What better way to become confident than to do things that you feel non-confident doing.

3) Change your posture: For some reason your posture greatly effects how you interact with people & think about yourself. Begin practicing walking with your head held high and your chest out, (not comical). At first this may seem odd, but you will see that overtime a better posture will result in more confidence. People pick up on body language more than anything, and walking with confidence will allow you to speak with confidence.

4) Change your thoughts: Watch what your saying to yourself when talking to people. Are they thoughts that build you up, or tear you down? Begin speaking to yourself as you would to a friend who is looking for encouragement. It all begins with how you speak to yourself.

You won't be confident right away, but overtime you will notice a change if you commit yourself to it. The Key is your Thoughts. Keep changing them, and soon you will as well.

My Story ==>> http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CrepJUBr2SM